i notice more and more often a "fascination" with age, or at least the issue of age. it starts with the realization that people born in the sixties, who are just a bit older than me, are nearing fifty. but i still end up with the conviction that age is not a matter of calendar, but rather a state mind.
i remember back in elementary school, when addition and what a century was were the greatest problems i faced, the teacher made us calculate how old we would be in the year 2000. twenty-four seemed two lifetimes away. it seems that way again - just in the other direction... i thought i'd never get it, i had no idea what course i wanted to take, and in the end i didn't and don't have a grand scheme. i take each day for itself, with a general idea of where i want to go, and then i just work on it. work every day on something and eventually you get somewhere.
but then i look at my fellow man, and the life he lives... and i wonder whether i have it better, or made it better, and should try to "save" him... or perhaps i am the fool, peter pan, dismissing the obligatory maturation...
in any case, my body reminds me from time to time (to time, to time, and then again) that things are not as they used to be, that the accumulation of experience has become overwhelming, and that time is inevitably passing... hence - more advanced age.
